Today...

I came out to get in my car after working at the Fayetteville office, and the sun was setting and shining brightly. There had been a big rain, and the droplets on the windshield were caught in the light in a way that could not be ignored. I pulled the camera out of the back seat, and started clicking pictures. My boss walked out and said, "What are you taking pictures of?" Sometimes I think he is pretty certain that I am weird. Very perceptive of him.

Ever have those days when you really don't know what to think or feel? And then I realize I don't have to know what to think or feel - I need to just think and feel what I do. Active acceptance.

The uncertainty of how the people who matter in our lives feel or what they think seems to me to be one of the biggest areas of uncertainty, fear and doubt we face. While I see so much progress in how I think about the world -- when I came to accept that I no longer sought people's approval was the moment I became a better person in every sense of the word, but I still want to understand so many things that I cannot. It's so frustrating to not know. Does the inability to know make anyone else crazy?

So tonight I accept my life, and today's certainties and uncertainties as the raindrops accept the sunlight. And I refuse to let it this acceptance to be wiped away. I am brave enough to feel the way I do, and confident enough to know what makes me crazy, and patient enough to see what will happen. What else can I do?

D90 85mm f/8 1/1600 ISO 400