Managing Frustrations
I end some days feeling worse than others. Today, without any one thing in particular, had all of its good moments overshadowed by bad. It ultimately came down to my inability to manage my frustrations.
This beautiful sky, and yet having to deal with drama that I don't want to... Kids are ready for school, and then things change suddenly and other decisions have to be made. Money spent (it's just money) but wondering where the next shoe will drop. Wishing a friend would be honest with me about his situation rather than just avoid me. Wanting something, and wondering if it was or is. Moving on in other ways, and still slapped back to reality. Fun, and then pause. A light, only to be snuffed out, or hidden by some new eclipse.
Thanks to my personal therapist, on my way west tonight, I got some peace from the shit in my head. Little things learned make me stronger, more capable for tomorrow.
I am about to fall asleep, and "ugh" is the sound I hear in my head as I think about today. The moon will be less full, but the shorter days are coming. The shadow is returning, and I must fight those little things from piling up on me all at once.
But I am touched by the struggle of others, for their own lost loves, their disappointments, the difficulties in dealing with those moving away, or moving on, in bold fashion, or by simple attrition. Makes me sad for my friends who suffer in a different way, these days, and to wish a peace to fill them, and ease their own journey into the future. I pray for the solace each are open to receiving.
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