Bittersweet

I leave Indy tomorrow. Like another day when I left Indy about a year ago, thinking it was the beginning of the rest of my life, but it turned out to be the last weekend of my life as I then hoped it to be.

A very good day -- lots of business opportunities await me here, in Kentucky and in Pennsylvania. I enjoyed dinner today at St. Elmo's -- the shrimp cocktail is killer -- and wonder how tomorrow will be, but look forward to being in Atlanta and back home thereafter. I have children, work, new business opportunities and new sales. I love my professional life, most aspects of my personal life and my role as a parent and a mentor. I just wish I felt different.

I speak now as a man who drank too much tonight, with a fabulous dinner and time with friends, but without the filter that comes with sobriety. I want an honest life, and wish for others to understand that about me, and to accept my honesty as simply who I am. I cannot predict who or what the future is, but the journey of my last eighteen months has made me stronger, and more certain of where I am headed. Those who want to be a part of it can either make a decision to be a part of it, or not.

Loved my Neil message this am: "holding a grudge does no one any good, and rarely achieves the result of hurting or damaging the one you cannot forgive." I do not, as a general rule, want to damage or hurt anyone, but I know that I am as strong, as certain and as much me as I will ever be. Choose to accept that or not -- your choice.